Tag Archives: Middle East

Middle East turmoil takes farcical twist as man wins country in raffle

The turbulent situation in the Middle East turned farcical today when it was revealed that a Leicester man has won ownership of a country in the region after entering his name into a raffle as part of a crisp promotion.

Forty-six-year-old Thomas Eddlington, an unemployed door-to-door door salesman from Leicester, was informed of his competition win this morning and will fly out to the Gulf state of Oman some time next week to form a new government.

Mr. Eddlington spoke of his surprise at the win, saying that he didn’t even remember sending away the token from the packet of Walkers Cheese and Onion Squares.  The competition offered consumers the opportunity to win a range of prizes, including; a years supply of Walkers Squares, a weekend in Skegness, a desktop lamp, 14 garden gnomes and ownership of the Gulf state of Oman.

“I’ve never been the leader of a small country in the Middle East,” said Mr. Eddlington, ” but I’m looking forward to the experience.  I’m not quite sure what kind of rules I’m going to make up yet, but the way I see it, a lot of the tension in the Middle East comes from the fact that they make their women cover up over there, innit?  If I ban those long garments and let the ladies reveal a little more flesh, I think that might solve a lot of their problems.”


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World news special report

Following the ousting of Egypt’s President Mubarak and Tunisian President Zine al-Abidine Ben Ali, unrest has been spreading throughout the Middle East and Northern Africa.

Violent protests against Colonel Gaddafi’s reign in Libya have reportedly left hundreds of people dead, while Shia protesters in Bahrain have occupied the capital’s main square.

As sporadic protests break out in other areas in the region such as Syria, Morocco and Tunisia, we contacted one of the world’s leading experts in international affairs for his considered opinion on what might happen next in the Middle East.

“Who the hell knows?”  was his response.

On other pages….

Jordan seen sharing oxygen with several men in London nightclub (pages 5-12)
David Beckham:  “My Royal Wedding invitation is the greatest moment in Prince William’s life” (page 29)
Murdoch speaks out on latest News of the World phone-hacking scandal:  “I will listen to all of your complaints”  (page 31 – subscription applies)

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